Anyone cursorily familiar with Crispin Glover would know that he’s an…interesting guy. From nearly kicking David Letterman in the face to having the middle name Hellion, from touring with his own super-weird movie and slideshow to covering Charles Manson, it’d be near impossible to pick something boring out of his catalog (except maybe the Charlie’s Angels movies). But, The Big Problem Does Not Equal the Solution, The Solution Equals Let It Be might be a highlight, a concept album revolving around finding the solution to a problem, then calling Glover to tell him the answer. Plus, it features “Clowny Clown Clown”, just a few tracks before his version of “These Boots are Made For Walking”.
The opening carnival synths play against a very dapper looking Glover, the man possibly best known as George McFly in Back to the Future. But, look! There he is, sliding around in the middle of some palm trees! There are dogs running around! Hey, a sexy clown lady dancing slowly! Plus, the lyrics are glorious: “I was walking on the ground. I didn’t make a sound. Then I turned around and I saw a clown. Had a frown. Stood on a mound. Started barking like a hound.” Take that, Shakespeare!
Later, Glover gets painted up like a mime and makes out with a lady wearing a clown mask. But, then, tragedy strikes. The clown of the song falls ill: “I wondered what to do. I didn’t know what to think, so I got a drink. And then I showed it something that was round, and it died, smiled, and fell on the ground.” Glover brings flowers to the grave, sees a man with a pig mask, and smokes a cigar before seeing himself, in full Letterman-kicking character, standing up on a hill.
There’s more cigar-smoking, standing, looking serious, and hitting clown heads with hammers before the end. If you’ve figured out the solution, give me a call before Crispin. I’d really like to know.